How You’re Sneakily Sabotaging Your Efforts

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You’ve been putting in the work—showing up for your rides, setting goals, practicing regularly. But if you’re still not seeing the breakthroughs you expect, I want you to pause and ask yourself: What’s really holding me back?

It’s easy to blame external factors—the weather, the horse, your schedule—but I’m going to tell you something that might sting a little: the real sabotage is happening in your mind.

I’ve seen this time and again with riders who are stuck. They think they’re doing everything right, but their mindset is the very thing stopping them from leveling up.

Here’s 5 ways you’re mentally sabotaging your progress with your horse. 

1. Self-Doubt

It’s subtle. You might not even realize it’s there. That little voice that whispers, “You’re not ready for this,” or “You’re not as good as the other riders,” “Maybe you should wait and enter the next show.” It causes hesitation. It makes you second-guess yourself mid-pattern. And that’s where the mistakes creep in.

I have one client who’s been riding for years, but every time she approached a competition, she’d freeze up. It wasn’t her ability that was lacking—it was her belief in herself. Through mental rehearsal and targeted mindset coaching, she finally broke through that wall of doubt. In her next show, she rode with a confidence she’d never felt before, and the results? A personal best score and a grin that said it all.

2. Perfectionism

I get it—you want to get it right. But here’s the deal-and I know what I’m talking about as a recovering perfectionist: striving for perfection is slowing your progress. It’s like you’re trying to climb the mountain carrying a backpack of rocks. Yeah, you might still make the climb, but it’s sooo much slower and more painful than it needs to be. Every time you zero in on what went wrong instead of what went right, you reinforce the belief that you’re falling short.

Perfectionism isn’t a badge of honor; it’s the anchor that’s holding you down. One of my clients was constantly chasing a flawless performance. Every ride became a session of self-criticism. She couldn’t see the 90% she was nailing because she was obsessed with the 10% that wasn’t. Once we shifted her mindset to celebrate progress over perfection, everything changed. She began to enjoy her rides again and, funnily enough, those “imperfections” she stressed over started fading.

3. Negative Self-Talk

Have you ever caught yourself saying, “I always mess up at this part,” or “I just can’t get it”? That’s not just a random thought—it’s a mental habit. And it’s sabotaging you because your brain believes whatever you feed it, whether it’s true or not.

For instance, another rider I worked with, was stuck in a loop of saying, “I’ll never get this lead change right.” Guess what? She didn’t—for months. After we worked together on rewiring her self-talk, she replaced that with “I’m mastering my lead changes.” Within a few weeks, she started hitting those changes consistently. Your words shape your reality, whether you realize it or not.

That’s exactly the kind of transformation we focus on inside Resilient Reiner Academy. If you find yourself stuck in that same pattern—caught in negative self-talk, overlooking your progress, or believing that becoming a great rider is only for “other people”—then RRA is the place for you. Come join us, and we’ll work together to shift your mindset so you can start seeing real results in the saddle.

4. Comparison

Ok, for number four, it’s true comparison is the thief of joy. It’ll also sabotage your progress!

It’s sneaky, isn’t it? You’re scrolling through social media or looking around the warm-up pen, and suddenly, everyone else seems more talented, more confident, more successful. Here’s the truth: comparison will kill your confidence every single time. You’re on your own journey, but when you focus on everyone else’s, you lose sight of your own progress.

One client spent more time comparing herself to the other riders in her barn than focusing on her own growth. It made her feel like she was always behind. We worked on shifting her focus inward, tracking her progress against herself week by week instead of constantly looking outward. And guess what? Her riding improved because she stopped trying to measure up to anyone but herself.

5. Fear of Failure

I know this one well because it shows up in so many ways. You don’t push for the next level because you’re afraid you’ll fall short. You keep playing it safe, staying in your comfort zone, and never risking the failure that might just lead to your biggest breakthrough.

For example, I used to be terrified of making mistakes in the show pen (did I mention I’m a recovering perfectionist?) 😆 This fear kept me from giving 100%, and it showed. Once I tackled this head-on with visualization and mental rehearsal, and releasing limiting beliefs, I learned to embrace the possibility of failure as part of the learning process, and not something fatal and world ending. I learned to stop playing it safe—and while I didn’t win every time, I rode better than ever, and started to win a lot more than before.

So, what do you do about it?

Self-sabotage: what’s a rider to do about it? You start with awareness. Recognize these sneaky little saboteurs for what they are: mental roadblocks that aren’t real. Let me say it again for those in the back: They aren’t reality—they’re just thoughts. Wild little toddler thoughts running unchecked, whispering lies, and running the show.

But guess what? You’re in control, and you have the power to change the narrative. You don’t have to keep thinking the same limiting thoughts over and over again! You don’t have to keep making the same mistakes. 

If you’re feeling stuck, or like you’re capable of so much more (but just can’t get past what’s holding you back), then it’s time to take control of your mindset & mental game.

This is where mental rehearsal comes in. Visualization is your secret weapon for breaking through the barriers in your mind. When you can see success in your mind, you begin to create it in your reality. It’s not woo-woo; it’s proven. It’s how top athletes in the world break through. And it’s how you’re going to break through, too.

That’s why I’m inviting you to my Mental Rehearsal for Riders Masterclass –because I know how powerful this is. In this class, I’ll walk you through exactly how to harness the power of visualization to ride with the kind of flow that makes everything feel effortless and make the kind of massive progress that leaves others asking what your secret is.

You can keep grinding away, hoping things will change, or you can get intentional and take control of your mental game and start creating the breakthroughs you’ve been waiting for.

If this feels like the next step you’ve been looking for, I’d love to have you join me. 

You can keep grinding away, hoping things will change, or you can get intentional and take control of your mental game and start creating the breakthroughs you’ve been waiting for.

Click here to join the masterclass and discover how to ride with the confidence and focus you’ve always wanted.

Because here’s the thing—you’re closer to success than you think. All it takes is getting out of your own way.

See you in the masterclass, cowboy,

Nicole