That Feeling You’re Embarrassed To Admit... aka Why Her Success Stings (And What It Really Means)

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I’ll never forget the first time I felt comparison in my body.

I was standing at the back gate, watching another rider warm up. She looked so confident. So in control. Like she belonged there.

And without warning, my chest tightened. My breath got shallow. My thoughts started spinning:

“Am I behind?”
“Should I be further along by now?”
“Maybe I’m not cut out for this…”

At the time, I didn’t have the words for it. But now I do:
Comparison.

It’s sneaky. Subtle. And SO normal.

But here’s what I’ve learned since:
That feeling? That contraction? That moment of shrinking?
It’s not proof you’re not good enough. It’s not a sign you’re behind.

It’s actually a clue.
A message from your gut.
A quiet nudge saying:
“That? That’s something you want too.”

Because if it didn’t matter to you, your body wouldn’t have reacted.

What looks like comparison is often just desire in disguise.

And that was the shift for me.
Instead of making myself wrong for feeling that way…
I got curious.

What do I really want?
And how can I create it my way?

Because here’s what most people don’t tell you:

You could try to ride like her.
Train like her. Talk like her. Post like her.
But you’ll never get her results.

Why?

Because her success isn’t just about her strategy—
It’s about how her nervous system responds under pressure.

She rides from a place of safety, not survival.
Her body lets her show up confident, present, and connected—because she’s trained it to.

And when your body lights up watching someone else ride with power or presence or pure joy…
That’s not a cue to blindly copy-paste.
That’s a cue to claim what’s possible for you, too.

That moment in the warm-up pen?
That scroll on social media?
That little zing of “ugh—I want that”?

It’s not there to shame you.
It’s there to show you.

✨You’re not too far behind.
✨It’s not too late.
✨And you don’t have to become someone else to get there.

You can have the ride you want.
The confidence. The clarity. The joy.
And yes—the version of you who actually shows up bold in the saddle again…

…but it only comes when you ride your own way.

So the next time comparison creeps in, ask:
What is this showing me about what I want?
And how can I create it in a way that’s true to me?

You don’t have to push harder. You don’t have to be perfect.
You just have to choose you.

And if you’re ready to do that with support, structure, and a proven process to get back in the saddle feeling bold and free again…

👉 Ride Free kicks off with our Welcome Call this Tuesday.
Want in? DM me on Instagram @nicoleburnettmentalcoach to slide in—like my horses racing to the gate at dinnertime. 🤠🐎

Rooting for you always,
Nicole