The Ugly Truth No Trainer Will Tell You

Hey! Prefer to listen instead of read the Newsletter? I got you! The Resilient Reiner Newsletter also comes as a podcast! 🎙️ Tune in to the latest episodes now! 

THE STUFF NO ONE TELLS YOU

Listen up, because I’m about to flip your entire concept of progressing as a rider on its head.

Here’s the brutal truth, cowboy: You’re expecting your trainer and your horse to do the work for you, and that’s where you’re shooting yourself in the foot.

You think that more lessons, more time with your trainer, or riding a better horse will magically fix everything. But here’s the truth—it’s not your horse or your trainer that’s holding you back. It’s you.

More lessons won’t magically fix everything. I’ve worked with riders who’ve had the best trainers and the best horses, and still hit a plateau. Why? Because they were waiting for someone else to build their confidence. That’s a mindset trap that will keep you stuck, no matter how much you invest in your training.

On the flip side, it’s really fun to work with someone who has the underdog horse and through mental coaching, see them step into the Confident Champion I know is inside them and go win against folks who spent many tens of thousands of dollars more on their horse. 

You’re relying on someone else to build your confidence, to tell you when you’re ready, and to guide you through every move. And sure, having a great trainer is important, but at the end of the day, they can’t ride the horse for you.

Think about it. You can have the best trainer in the world, the most talented horse, and still fall short because you haven’t built the mental muscles to handle the pressure and believe in yourself.

And guess what? You can’t outsource confidence. No amount of training or perfect lessons will fix the fact that deep down, YOU don’t believe you’re capable. Your trainer can’t give you that belief. Your horse can’t give you that belief. That has to come from within.

It took me years to learn that confidence isn’t something you can get from your trainer. It’s something you build within yourself. Once I started focusing on my mental game—visualizing my rides, mentally rehearsing each move, developing my own unshakable confidence, focus, and presence—I stopped depending on external validation and started owning my rides. That’s when everything changed.

Cut the crap. Stop waiting for someone else to give you permission to be confident. Start doing the internal work to build your belief in yourself, because that’s where the real transformation happens.

Your trainer and horse can set the stage, but you have to step up and own it.

🔥 Nicole

PS- I am always in your corner! You can always reach out when you’re ready for 1:1 coaching. 

Go HERE for my FREE MASTERCLASS on how to develop your own unshakable confidence as a rider. And HERE to grab Mental Rehearsal for Riders training I did last week to making winning that belt buckle feel like deja vu not a pipe dream