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What Do Tuning Forks Have to Do with Better Riding?
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Howdy, friend!
When I was a kid, the neighbors two houses down could hear us singing. It was a musical home. Mind you, it paid off for my sister who is a professional singer. But, as you can imagine, there was a lot of music. A lot of sound. A lot of noise.
Growing up in a musical household, I became familiar with something called a tuning fork. If you’ve never encountered one, it’s a small fork-shaped tool that, when tapped, vibrates at a specific pitch. Now, imagine you have two tuning forks, each vibrating at different frequencies. So you have these two different tuning forks creating two different sounds.
When they’re both activated, they eventually sync up to resonate at the same pitch. One frequency will always dominate. They're going to fight it out. Invisibly. And only one sound will win out. They will end up making the same noise.
This got me thinking about how similar this concept is to our emotional states and how they play out in our relationships—especially with our horses!
It's such a vivid reminder of why all of this matters. Why it matters to master your mindset, why it matters that you are a calm, confident, capable rider.
Why it matters that you're focused and resilient as a rider. Why you can't just rely on your horse for everything.
Let me give you another example of “tuning forks” in action.
Let's say you're at home. And you've had a fantastic day. You got a raise at work. You had the best ride ever on your horse! And you went to the salon and you have the bestest, most bouncy blowout ever. You're feeling fine. You're feeling good.
In contrast, let's say your poor husband overslept. (His alarm didn't go off). He didn't get to do his hair this morning. He got chewed out at work and then on his way home… he got pulled over for speeding. (He's having a truly terrible day).
Well, when he walks through that door and the two of you are in the same home, it's not going to work for you guys to be at different emotional frequencies. Either you're going to end up cranky like him orrrrrr he is gonna choose to be happy and joyful with you.
But do you see how it’s unsustainable when you have competing emotional states?
He is either going to join you at your emotional state, or you're going to join him at his emotional state. One of you always adjusts to match the other’s mood. This same dynamic occurs between you and your horse!
Horses are incredible emotional mirrors. They pick up on your energy, your mood, your intentions, and they reflect it right back at you. If you’re calm, focused, and centered, your horse can relax, trust, and respond better. But if you’re stressed, anxious, or distracted, your horse will pick up on that too, often leading to tension, resistance, or fear.
You can use the power of these emotional frequencies to make that your reality. This is where it gets really exciting because that kind of connection is not just a dream and it's totally within your reach. The key is learning to tune your emotional frequency to understand and manage your own energy. So that you're always sending out the right signals and then your horse can join you. When you are calm, when you're focused and present, your horse can mirror that.
They relax.
They trust.
They become more responsive to you.
And I know this is challenging. If you've had a bad day or you start a ride and then your horse is a little stiff, and they're just physically having a hard time. But you're getting kind of frustrated since the ride isn't going the way you want.
This is when you get to put this in action!
You get to say.
What is the emotional state that I want to hold? What is the emotional state that I want to cultivate? How do I want our relationship to be?
And then you get to choose to create and hold that emotional frequency. Do you want to be calm, centered, relaxed, confident?
If you want those things, it’s up to you to create that environment – even when (or especially when) – your horse is having a hard time. When you're working with your horse, you have to remember that despite the emotional richness of your own life, your horse is also having their own life and experience, too. Maybe they got in a little tiff with their stall mate. Maybe they're a little sore. Maybe they were really looking forward to eating more hay.
But you get to choose. Every time you interact, are you going to meet them where they're at? Are you going to create a negative emotional environment? Or are you going to create and hold a positive emotional environment where they can meet you?
Here’s my challenge for you:
Next time you head out to the barn, I challenge you to become a conscious creator of your emotional state. Decide how you want to feel—calm, centered, relaxed, confident—and hold that space no matter what’s happening with your horse. Trust me, this shift in mindset will revolutionize your rides, your training, and your connection with your horse.
And you're in charge of holding that space no matter what's going on for your horse. this will change so much for you in your riding, your training, your relationship with your horse. I can't wait to hear how this goes for you. Try it out, send me a message about what it did for you!
And if confidence is something you’re looking to cultivate, I’ve got just the thing for you. I’m offering a free masterclass on how to create unshakable confidence as a rider. It’s packed with practical tools that you can start using today to build your confidence and strengthen your partnership with your horse. Sign up here: www.resilientreiner.com/RRA_free_masterclass_signup
I can’t wait to hear how this goes for you. Try it out, and let me know what changes you notice in your riding and your relationship with your horse!
Until next time, keep your mind clear, your energy positive, and your rides in harmony.
Happy Trails,
Nicole
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