You Want it So Bad You Can Taste It

Today, I decided to pull my head out of my butt, and do something different.

Except, doing something different actually meant doing what I did before.

Sometimes I need the perspective of time, the clarify of contrast, to see more clearly better ways of doing, of being.

See, I’m driven to help Western Riders experience how fundamentally transformative mental performance techniques can be—no matter how far along the journey any given rider is. I’ve seen the effect they’ve had on Nicole’s riding and showing, and (tangentially) I’ve experienced the profound impact they’re having on our client’s riding. It makes me want to spread the word—to shout it from every corner and roof top…To stalk the Jehovah’s Witnesses around the neighborhood, knocking on the same doors and handing out pamphlets for our Resilient Reiner Mental Performance Coaching programs.

I do the next best thing and launch ads. On Google. On YouTube. On Twitter. On Instagram. I set up landing pages, and obsess over every last word on each page. Stay up till 3 AM thinking of new strategies and ways of communicating with our “audience,” our folks, our community…

It didn’t happen all at once, it was literally a slippery slope. While I’ve always tended toward Night Owl, I found myself justifying staying up “just a little later.” Doing just “one more thing.” Which led to to subsequent nights being later and later and later. All in the quest for capturing more time to execute on the vision of what we’re building.

My days went from rich and meaningful, to a desperate dash for completion. Two to three walks a day declined to…none. Weight lifting was axed. Nutritious food became whatever was most convenient. Rather than mindfulness and meditation, I was mindlessly taking the bull by the horns and attempting to force it to submit. I was trying to expedite success…at the cost of doing what was right and good for my own body, mind, and relationships.

I realized I felt like I was drowning. That’s an odd metaphor, but I think it makes sense. When you’re drowning you’re overwhelmed by your deep need to survive, to live. That overwhelming primal need can swamp your ability to be rational, to think: and instead of doing what is smart, what will give you the best long-term chance of survival in stormy seas, you start kicking, scrambling with your hands and arms. You’re not even efficiently treading water. You’re just wrestling with water, as ineffectual as that is. Mindlessly writhing in the water.

That’s what I think I’ve been doing. In my primal overwhelming need to give life to our business, to make it live and thrive and be a vehicle helping our clients achieve their riding and showing dreams, I’ve lost sight of how to truly live.

Ironic, isn’t it? Because if you ever find yourself “overboard” the trick is to move less. Tilt your head back, make small downward circles with your palms facing down, lift your legs as if sitting in a low chair, then kick down and out and then bring your legs together. The hard thing is choosing to be mindful and calm in these moments of overwhelming primal feelings. It’s no small matter to pause, take a breath, and think for a moment when the need to survive, the need to live, or the need to sustain life (as in our business) is consuming you.

But perhaps it’s especially crucial that the more we want something, the more we take these moments to pause, to reflect, and then to adopt the efficient path to our desired objectives.

Because, if you don’t tread water when you find yourself overboard, drowning can happen in seconds, though unconsciousness from being submerged under water can take up to three minutes. But if you DO tread water you can stay alive for 3-8 HOURS. And if you can stay alive for that long you dramatically increase your odds of survival. Of being rescued, of washing ashore, or finding a log to hold onto.

I can see clearly now that it’s the same in our business, in our work to support you—our community. For us to survive, live, thrive, and to be here to support you in the years ahead, we need to tread water like our lives depend on it—which ironically means doing less. It means doing the equivalent of being smart in the water. Tilting our heads back might be synonymous with making time for our daily meditation and journaling. A time to reflect and pause and center.

Our small downward circles with palms facing down might be time outside, walks in the sunshine, connecting with our bodies through yoga or weight lifting.

Lifting our legs as if sitting in a low chair is maybe like getting enough sleep and eating well. And kicking out and down is maybe like nourishing our relationships with family and friends and self.

And I can’t help but imagine this same concept might apply to you, Dear Reader—to your life, your riding, your showing. That when you want it so bad you can taste it that you, too, might start acting like you’re drowning, that being mindful and intentional and thoughtful about how you pursue your riding and showing goals becomes perhaps desperate, obsessive. You’re not living, thriving as much as you could because you, too, have that bull by the horns and are trying to throw it to the ground, pin it—make it submit.

What happens if we trust in God, in the Universe, in whatever your believe in, that we will succeed? What if we are grateful for our inevitable success? What happens if me and Nicole exercise gratitude that our business is helping thousands of riders by the end of 2024 experience vast transformations in their riding and showing, to the degree we become known as THE people to talk to to go to the next level?

What happens if you put yourself, even just for a few minutes in a headspace that you experience overwhelming gratitude that you HAVE achieved ________ (insert something you want to achieve) by ________ (insert an element of time, e.g., by next week, next month…)?

What happens when we treat our success (yours and ours) as assured and live accordingly—making sure our foundation is strong. Consistently getting enough sleep, eating well, exercising, quality time with our friends and family, ensuring we have daily time to reflect and breathe through meditation and journaling?

I think gratitude coupled with a good foundation, even if it means less time training, riding, showing, working will ultimately see better results, in less time, and a richer life we can be proud of.

I’ve pulled my head out of my butt, and I’m getting back to the basics. Now, over to you: Examining the “foundation” of your life, what’s one area you’re going to apply the change-through-feeling-good principle to improve?

You’ve got this, mis compadres.

Until next time,

The Non-Horsey Husband,

Abe

How we can support YOU right now:

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Secure your spot by June 18th, to get started on Monday, June 19th.

Register now at www.resilientreiner.com/freemymind and be part of this unique journey to unlock your potential in and out of the show pen. What have you got to lose? Absolutely nothing.